My heart's been deceitful; its all artificial sweetener

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Failure.

It is so ... not me ... i should have think thrice.

So this is how a failure leader feel like, a total 1...

Janelle was the first to approach me to organise this capt ball session u know... well it took a lot of months after i really set my mind to go for it. She just like my ka kias, and i know she look up to me as a 'more mature' bro(with joseph)/playmate(with eustacia). She was one that love capt ball more than anyone else here. She even offered her ball. She prolly a better captain than me (even though i pwned her with height). She didn't had her fun too much coz her team found her better standing on top of the chair, she did v well even im standing beside her.

After 40mins, we took a break. . . the ground is still wet. We decided to have our 2nd round but some of them already took enough injuries so we short of players to continue, we decided to play 'ice & water' (aka iceman or catching all or nothing if u muz). I already took the first drop and got some bruises on my legs, i should haf stop it.. but i continued...

She fell down shortly after me, she had a bad fall...

her tooth cracked and half of the tooth drop out... i heard the rest were still in but shattered, she felt dat they are falling... serious injury on her legs, ankle, chin and lips. my mind spinned v fast dat moment... her cry scream from the ladies, ... i dunno how to describe my heart ..., sitting outside helplessly waiting. i totally disappointed in myself... looking at her, heartbroken with her tooth, her image, a perm mark in her life, and all i could do is vain but to keep blaming myself.

Please pray for janelle chong, pray God's healing hand be upon her.

dun try comfort me le, i had enough... as a leader, responsiblility is a must, and i fail to do so...

crap me.

secretly in love_____